The ones that got away....
On occasion, the editor suggests items for coverage within the Ouch blog which are turned down as falling outwith the BBC's policy guidelines. She has requested that Lady Bracknell permit her own blog to be used, just this once, to publicise two of these items which, the editor believes, merit a wider audience than they might otherwise receive. Lady Bracknell, whilst priding herself on being a firm employer, is also of the opinion that staff should occasionally be permitted to cast off their yoke of subservience in this modern day and age. She will therefore turn her attentions to other things and permit the editor temporary free rein. She trusts, however, that the editor will desist from abusing this rare privilege...
Karma (or, The Hind's Revenge)
Thomas Harn is sixteen years old. He lives in a trailer park. His favourite thing in all the world is slaughtering innocent deer (sorry, "hunting"). Thomas fell out of a hunting stand and broke his spine. Thomas is now a wheelchair user. Has he fully appreciated the irony of his situation? It would appear not:
"I can still go hunting," he said. "They make deer stands for people in wheelchairs." Read more about Thomas' "inspiring" story here.
(This one was deemed to be too rude to be published on the BBC. So you may want to bear that fact in mind before you read any further, or follow this link.)
Anyone who works on a telephone helpline will be aware of the potential for them storing up musculo-skeletal problems for the future. That, after all, is why we have headsets. But it's not just the dialling and the poor posture which can cause permanent damage. Well, not if you work on a sex-line, anyway....
Now, maybe I've been labouring under a misapprehension for years, but I was always given to understand that the women who work on these phone lines were just pretending to be aroused whilst actually doing the crossword, or working on a nice piece of needlepoint, or something. After all, the sad blokes who phone up can't actually see what you're doing.
I'm reminded of what Laurence Olivier famously said on the set of Marathon Man to Dustin Hoffman who had stayed awake for three days and generally put himself through hell to ensure a realistic performance: "My dear boy, why don't you try acting?"