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The collected opinions of an august and aristocratic personage who, despite her body having succumbed to the ravages of time, yet retains the keen intellect, mordant wit and utter want of tact for which she was so universally lauded in her younger days. Being of a generation unequal to the mysterious demands of the computing device, Lady Bracknell relies on the good offices of her Editor for assistance with the technological aspects of her journal.

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Location: Bracknell Towers

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

IQ Test

Picture the scene...

You are a member of the disability advisory committee which I chair.

As an adjustment under the DDA for me, you come to Liverpool for our meetings. (Which I do appreciate, by the way.)

You know that the venue for today's meeting is the Glaxo Neurological Centre on Norton Street.

You have been provided with a map. It shows you which side of Norton Street the Glaxo Neurological Centre is on.

You use the map to find Norton Street.

There are two buildings on the side of the road on which you know the meeting venue is located.

One of them is a coach station.

How long does it take you to deduce that the building which isn't the coach station - and which has "Neuro-centre" on its external signage (although, admittedly, not "Glaxo") - must be the meeting venue?

If anyone wants me, I'll be banging my head repeatedly against the nearest brick wall.

The Editor


Blogger Mary said...

Out on a limb here, but surely if I wander into the coach station and say "I'm here for the meeting of the disability advisory committee," kindly people might indicate that this is NOT the building I am looking for?

And then when I say I'm looking for Glaxo, they say "wrong entrance, you want next door"?

9:01 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I suspect I would at the very least feel obliged to enquire at the Neuro-Centre place and ask whether it was the correct location before telephoning someone to say I was lost.

However, with respect to the person you were dealing with, I presume they caught a bus...

10:40 am  
Blogger Katie said...

I can't read maps. But I do have more common sense.

I suspect your committee member also delivers my pizzas. Or is supposed to deliver my pizzas. He struggles to find the building. If you knew how achingly obvious my building is, you would cry.

My building is so obvious that I'm not going to describe it because that is the equivalent of publishing my home address on the internet. My building has the name of my building written across the front entrance. The same name that was written on the delivery slip.

Pizza boy stood outside this door with the delivery slip in his hand and failed to realise it was the correct location.

I was hungry, too.

1:32 am  
Blogger laughing said...

So how long did it take for everyone to find the place?

Or are you still waiting for them?

1:01 pm  
Blogger Lady Bracknell said...

Sadly, no.

After a five-minute panic, they arrived and proceeded to imply that it was my fault that the signage didn't contain the word "Glaxo".

This amused me about as much as the occasion on which a chap who had attended a meeting I ran in Birmingham some years ago used the feedback sheet - which we gave out in the hopes of identifying things we might do better the following year - to say that he would have enjoyed the day more had it not been raining so much.

9:07 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Proof positive, I fear, that it is possible to be both disabled and handicapped.

Question is - How do you solve a problem like... someone who is dim enough to behave thus?

10:42 pm  
Blogger Optistatic said...

You mean that you don't control the weather?

*Shakes head in disgust*

Here's me thinking that you were a Person of Influence, and you can't even prevent rain in Birmingham.

Must do better next time.

Perhaps you should send out sunny vibes. I know that the vibes I send out when people act in an utterly stupid way around me are very sunny. *cough*

11:13 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

One time, I was at a meeting that happened to be inside a high school classroom building that also happened to be surrounded by several small dorm buildings associated with the school. (This was a school where students usually boarded). This building was THE primary building for the school. It's THE building that most people would normally think of if you were to say, "Meet me at this school."

We decided to order take out food. The person placing the order instructed them where to meet at a specific entrance for the school building. The person at the restaurant explained that they could only deliver if they had the name of a specific building -- not just "the high school" but which building. (Apparently they were familiar enough with the school to realize that there were several dorm buildings there.) The person trying to place the order explained that, yes, we were in the SCHOOL BUILDING. The restaurant person repeated their explanation that they could only deliver the food if they had instructions for WHICH BUILDING. The person placing the order again explained that they were being instructed to come to the MAIN SCHOOL BUILDING at X entrance. The restaurant person again explained that ...

I wasn't there, but apparently things kind of went into an endless feedback loop. The person placing the order (or trying to) was borrowing someone else's land-line phone in the building, and that person grew exasperated because she was sure it could not be so hard to explain things to the restaurant person. So she took over trying to explain things. And then she, too, find herself trying to explain that, erm, yes, this WAS a specific building at the school, namely, the MAIN SCHOOL BUILDING ... and the restaurant person ...

I no longer recall how the situation was resolved in the end. We did get something to eat, I just don't remember how!

3:04 am  

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