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The collected opinions of an august and aristocratic personage who, despite her body having succumbed to the ravages of time, yet retains the keen intellect, mordant wit and utter want of tact for which she was so universally lauded in her younger days. Being of a generation unequal to the mysterious demands of the computing device, Lady Bracknell relies on the good offices of her Editor for assistance with the technological aspects of her journal.

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Location: Bracknell Towers

Thursday, January 01, 2009


Although Lady Bracknell has spent some time of late doubting the evidence of her own ears, she is now absolutely convinced that some person residing locally has invested in a cockerel.

Whilst this might not be a purchase which would expose the buyer to comment were it to have taken place in the depths of the countryside, Bracknell Towers - as regular readers will be aware - is situated, as is only fitting for an aristocrat of Lady Bracknell's social standing, in the city. It is, admittedly, adjacent to a large park, but Lady Bracknell has seen no signs of any tillage of the earth, or other reliable indicators of agricultural activity, during her stately perambulations through its pleasant acres.

Whilst the crowing of a cockerel has considerable charm at something after eight of the clock on a winter's morning, Lady Bracknell suspects the creature's popularity is likely to wane somewhat should it continue to greet the dawn with such audible enthusiasm in the early months of the coming summer.

It being the first of January, Lady Bracknell will avail herself of the opportunity to wish health and happiness - as long as neither is gained at the expense of other persons - to those loyal readers who continue to peruse these humble pages on a regular basis.


Blogger Mary said...

and may your humble perusees (?) wish the same to your good self.

8:07 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I imagine the cockerel's charm will, as dawn retreats, equal that of the present beeping of my neighbour's smoke alarm as its battery dies. The very neighbour who is away until 25th January...

A happy new year to one and all.

11:30 pm  
Blogger DD said...

And a very happy New Year to your ladyship also.

Have the feline residents of Bracknell Towers shown any interest in finding out where the crowing noise is coming from?

2:50 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


My own hovel oft benefits from the early expostulations of a cockerel, courtesy of one of these, purchased by a chum who understands only too well my slugabed tendencies.

When the fine weather resumes, I have no doubt that tenants of neighbouring hovels, not to mention local foxes, will be greatly amused by its uncanny impersonation.


8:36 pm  
Blogger Lady Bracknell said...

"Temporarily out of stock" - darn!

8:47 pm  

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