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The collected opinions of an august and aristocratic personage who, despite her body having succumbed to the ravages of time, yet retains the keen intellect, mordant wit and utter want of tact for which she was so universally lauded in her younger days. Being of a generation unequal to the mysterious demands of the computing device, Lady Bracknell relies on the good offices of her Editor for assistance with the technological aspects of her journal.

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Location: Bracknell Towers

Sunday, April 29, 2007

La Peste

Sad news has reached Lady Bracknell's ears.

Apparently, Mr Larkin is desperately ill. The poor gentleman's life hangs by a thread. Retaining his spirit of scientific curiosity even in circumstances of extreme misfortune, he dragged his ailing frame to his computer yesterday evening to check his symptoms on the interwebnet.

The results of his search were even worse than he suspected. Mr Larkin has the plague. And not just any old common or garden plague, mark you, but the exceedingly virulent "Terrible, Terrible Plague".

Mr Larkin's sufferings must be great indeed: Lady Bracknell is given to understand that he has a sore - nay, gravelly - throat and a sniffly nose.

As the Editor would be inconsolable at the untimely loss of such a good friend, Lady Bracknell can only hope that Mr Larkin will pull through.


Blogger Mr Chuckles said...

Poor old Larkin, eh!? What a shame. Must be terrible to get to his age and then catch plague.
But don't fret - having suffered this virulent disease myself late last year, I can report that one usually pulls through, even though it may not seem likely at the time. What a consolation to him that he has such a dear friend in Lady B.

3:20 pm  
Blogger Charlesdawson said...

May I suggest that Lady Bracknell introduces Mr Larkin to the immortal Three Men in a Boat?

With a special reference to the chapter in which J gets hold of a Medical Encyclopedia.

7:15 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I consulted the esteemed Google as to the meaning of sore throat and runny nose (I felt lucky). It seems Mr Larkin may have Lung Disharmony due to External Invasion by Pernicious Influences. Is her Ladyship aware if he has any residual Spleen Dampness or Internal Wind?

8:55 pm  
Blogger Lady Bracknell said...

If his frequent references to "the green scirocco" are anything to go by then, yes, I think it's fair to say that he does have Internal Wind.

As to Spleen Dampness, I really wouldn't know...

9:40 pm  

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